women 4 hope

Dedicated to addressing women’s issues.

Find Peace By Solving Your Problems

Posted by Catherine Morgan on February 24, 2007

FOUR STEPS TO HELP YOU SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS — by Catherine Morgan

We all carry around stress and worries about problems in our lives, some of us more than others. If you are one of those people that can’t stop worrying about all the problems in your life, then this article is for you. Worrying about our problems only adds to our problems, and no amount of worrying about a situation is going to make it better. Letting go of negative thoughts and worries is an important step in our overall happiness. Hopefully these steps can help you get passed some of the problems that have been bothering you, and allow you to let go of the negative thoughts that block you from your true happiness.

Peaceful Morning
picture by © suzy1951

STEP ONE: IDENTIFY THE PROBLEMS

Take some time and write down all the problems that have been bothering you. Write each problem on a separate piece of paper, make sure you cover ALL the problems, the big ones and the little ones. For 10 problems, 10 separate sheets of paper. Do this when you have some time to really get a complete list together — Sometimes going to bed a few minutes earlier than you normally do, can be a good time to do this, and provide you with the quiet time you need.

At this time also write down the reasons for wanting to solve this problem, and what you hope to achieve by resolving it.

STEP TWO: WHAT ARE ALL YOUR OPTIONS FOR EACH PROBLEM?

I recommend that you start with the small problems, and work your way up to the more serious problems. So, you will be taking one of your sheets of paper, with one problem on it, and work through the rest of these steps. Don’t try to work each step with every problem at the same time, this doesn’t allow for your complete awareness and attention to each problem. Working with the small problems first, will give you a chance to become comfortable with these steps, and help you become confident in your ability to solve your problems.

So, lets go. You are now looking at the paper with one of your problems on it. Just start writing down every conceivable solution or option available for this problem, even the ones you don’t think you would consider. This could be as little as two, or as many as ten, depending on the problem or situation. Remember that the more options you give yourself, the better.

STEP THREE: WHAT ARE THE CONSEQUENCES OF EACH POTENTIAL SOLUTION?

Depending on the difficulty of the problem you are working on, you may be able to do this step in your head, or if it is helpful, you can write this step down as well.

What is a consequence: the logical or natural outcome to an action or condition.

Now, look at each option or solution you have come up with for this problem. What are the consequences of this option? Is it something that would make this problem worse? Or create another problem? If so, cross out that idea as a possible solution to this problem. Continue to consider the consequences of each idea, until you have covered each option.

Try to remember that there will most likely be consequences to all of your ideas. It may be a matter of finding the solution with the least consequences, not necessarily no consequences.

STEP FOUR: MAKE YOUR DECISION

Now that you have all of the important information about your problem and the possible solutions, it’s time to make a decision on what you are going to do. What is the best solution to this problem?

Once you make your decision, plan on implementing the solution as soon as possible. However, don’t discard your papers on this problem just yet. Make sure the outcome goes the way you expected, if not you may need to re-think this issue again, so keep your work. You may even go back to this problem and realize there was something about the situation you hadn’t considered. This is why keeping your work is important.

Well, I hope you find these ideas helpful. You may also want to check out FOUR TIPS TO LIVING IN THE MOMENT and FIVE STEPS TO FORGIVENESS.

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4 Responses to “Find Peace By Solving Your Problems”

  1. mumbaiKar said

    Your happines is more important than righting the injustices

    Anger is a normal reaction to a unfair event, but attempting to assign blame and seek justice is usually draining and also futile. It is more fruitful to release anger and move forward with the life.

  2. oldude59 said

    In a post I wrote some time about about my own encounter with “problems” I chose to describe it this way in terms of coping strategies:

    You know the neurotic defense means hunkering down into the blame game -someone or something did this terrible thing to you – denial of what has happened, and avoidance.

    The mature defense after a period is buoyed by your hipness – feeling the hit but not the moral conviction – redefine – analyzing the problem logically and collaboration/facilitation.

    The point being the number of step may vary but the point is the same – if you blame you are sure to be lame!

  3. “Mumbaikar” — Thanks for your comment, and that is what this post and many of my others are about. Letting go of problems, and angers……without blaming anyone, especially yourself. Just learning from these experiences….and moving on.

    and

    “Oldude59” — I’m glad you appreciated the post for what it was…like you said….the number of “steps” doesn’t matter….as long as the outcome is the same. I have a tendency to put things in terms of “steps”….just for the sake of showing people that might not normally be open to this type of thinking….giving them a quick and easy way to look at ideas they may not have considered in the past.

    Both of you may also like my post on forgiveness:

    http://catherinemarie.wordpress.com/forgiveness/

    Take care. and thanks again.

  4. Jessie said

    Jessie

    hi, great site! thanks for the info!

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